
Directed by David Giancola
Written by Don Mogavero
Starring Don Mogavero, Steve Railsback, Larry Linville, & Linda Ljoka
Release Date: 1997 (straight to video) Running Time: 1hr 37min Rating:
Not Rated
[There will be spoilers, but the movie existing in itself is a spoiler!]

A doughy looking guy, Sebastian Dellacourt (Mogavero, who also wrote this pile), is supposedly a government assassin, despite looking kind of like a cross between Bill Murray and Robert Englund (though they both still have way better hairlines). On what was supposed to be his last job (naturally!), he has to assassinate the ambassador of Chile, who’s having his birthday party at a Vermont ski resort (uh, I mean Chile!), but fucks it up when he doesn’t want a couple kids to get blown up (although someone else still plants the bomb on the ambassador’s car… mission accomplished? I guess).

After a scene of Sebastian struggling to run uphill in the snow, he gets into a slow snowmobile chase scene that culminates with it exploding (not nearly as exciting as when a car or larger vehicle explodes). Despite that “daring” escape, Sebastian is arrested later and put on trial. His wife (he somehow has an attractive wife and daughter) is appalled and asks if he was planning to become a serial killer (pretty much the same as a government assassin), then divorces him while he’s in jail. Oh the pathos that I am not feeling right now.